Everyone looks for reassurance at some time in their life or another. You want to make sure that what you do or what you say counts or is seen as important. Some people need it less than others and others need a lot more. While some get by with very little at all throughout their lives. Those in the latter portion push forward on their own merits, their own goals, conviction, passion and will. Those are truly strong people. However, I think that population is quite small.
It’s very difficult to feel like you count or that what you do is important if someone is always criticizing you. Usually the criticism far outweighs the compliments and then it seems like the praise is as thin as paper. It’s hard to not criticize – it’s human nature in a way to point out what is wrong. But there are ways to show and tell people that they can do something differently and it’s not a direct criticism. Very few people are adept at this kind of communication.
Ultimately, appreciation is something we crave while criticism isn’t. Feedback and constructive criticism are nice and dandy as concepts but if not phrased well, they can backfire tremendously. This creates a massive slide in morale and productivity. So I think the best thing to do is to just try harder to not criticize directly and just try to be more sincere with the praise. People can sense sincerity from a mile away.
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