Friday, May 17, 2013

Feedback

Around this time of year many companies begin to do their mid-year reviews. Employees are asked to self-assess their performance and to write up their accomplishments so far. I think the whole thing is hokey but nonetheless, I do it. It’s a good time to reflect on what you have done, what else needs to be done and why you aren’t doing certain things. I get the point of it but it’s still one of those administrative things full of sound and fury signifying nothing.


In my company we have to list about our 3 strengths and opportunities (they are trying to be politically correct and not say weaknesses but I think we all know what opportunities mean) in our assessment as well. A number of years ago a manager listed one of my opportunities as needing to speak more. This wasn’t to say I was mute; she just felt that I had lots of good ideas but that I wouldn’t share them. (The real reason I didn’t speak up is actually another story which I will have to discuss in another entry.)

After getting that comment, I did begin to speak up more in meetings and on conference calls but not to the point where I took over the conversation (mostly because that’s just not my style). I enjoy listening to what other people say over listening to myself speak. But I’m probably a rarity in my field.

For instance there was one person on my extended team a couple of months ago, who just sat on my nerves and plucked at them. He had to talk and talk in every meeting. At least 15 minutes of every meeting was filled with him chattering on. I really wanted to inflict pain on myself whenever he talked just to have a legitimate excuse to leave the room or the call so I wouldn’t have to hear him. After weeks of this incessant blabbering, I actually asked my boss if mr. blabber would be given an opportunity of ‘learning when to shut his trap’ on his mid-year review. Of course my boss laughed but defended him in saying “he has a lot of good things to say”. I told my boss that the emphasis should be on ‘a lot’. I thought we were being rated on concise speech? If a woman had spoken this much, I’m sure someone would have pulled her aside and told her to shut up. I was pretty sure that this guy would never hear that his useless drivel (because really a lot of it was hot air) was literally making people’s ears bleed.

The point in my bringing this up is that if you aren’t really going to give people constructive criticism, what’s the point in all this silly feedback formality. I could not have been the only one who complained about this guy talking people to death. Obviously if my boss laughed at it, there had to be truth in my comment. But where I was being told to speak up, I wonder if anyone was telling him to speak down!

Luckily I don’t have to listen to him anymore. Otherwise, I’d have a special set of noise canceling ear plugs made to shut out his ridiculous clamoring.

Monday, May 13, 2013

Squeaky Wheel

My office building was flooded during Hurricane Sandy. It is still not open. My team has been displaced and working between two different locations. Honestly this doesn’t bother me too much. I’ve gotten to meet people on my team that I probably wouldn’t have met otherwise.


What has been interesting is how things were handled through this whole displacement. We were not allowed to go in and get our desk contents or anything like that. Normally that wouldn’t bother me if I knew we’d be going to back to that building. Recently the items in our desks were sent to us, which led me to believe that we weren’t going to be returning to our old building. However no one was communicating the details of what was happening. We were notified only that we would be getting our desk contents shipped to us at our current locations and nothing else.

A few weeks ago I received 3 boxes and I went through the items. 99% of my things were there (my shoes weren’t lacking – see blog entry “Shoe Fetish”) so I wasn’t going to complain. (The 1% I honestly wasn’t sure was in my desk so there was no point in complaining about it.) Without a desk to call my own now (our team has to grab the first desk available at either of the locations we’re using) and nowhere to put these items now, I had to bring them home.

My husband and daughter drove out to my office building so they could transport my stuff home. Before meeting them I loaded a card that had a squeaky wheel. This damaged wheel made me laugh for a number of reasons.

1) It reminded me how ridiculous this whole displacement situation has been

2) It made me think about how people who complain a lot are named a ‘squeaky wheel’ yet are the ones who get what they want

3) I began to wonder if I shouldn’t be a squeaky wheel more myself.

A number of years ago I worked for a totally ridiculous woman who did nothing but complain. She was the epitome of the squeaky wheel. Yet the more she complained, the more attention she got as well as everything to solve her complaints. This cart set off a thought process in me that I never imagined. I decided that I needed to speak up more often. It really seemed that the squeaky wheel did get all the oil and being quiet wasn’t getting me anywhere.

Of course, the more I became vocal about things that didn’t work or that were upsetting me, I found I wasn’t getting what I wanted. More often it led me to believe that it only works for some people. It’s the tone that I use or the way I say things. I guess I’m not that annoying in certain situations (at least not at work) because I definitely was annoying my husband with my complaining. I never thought complaining was a skill! But somehow my old boss used it to her advantage. Maybe I’m not complaining to the right people? Well, it has now become another item in my arsenal of perplexing things. How does a squeaky wheel type person get their voice heard? How can I learn to get this annoying habit to work for me? Perhaps with time, the truth will be revealed to me.

Wednesday, May 1, 2013

Tasteless

The title of this entry would suggest that I am going to rant about the horrible fashion trends that I notice but that will actually have to wait for another entry. Today I’m going to talk about sinus infections. I’m sure most of you will turn away now.


I am unblessed with seasonal allergies. Every year as the blooms bud and the flowers appear, I am reeling in pressure headaches, watery eyes and sneezing. I don’t usually mind because I take medication to control the symptoms. But this year when I thought that my medication was working, it wasn’t helping me clear out the fun stuff that accumulates in my nasal passages.

I am plagued with a sinus infection. I tend to get one every year for different reasons but it’s usually in the summer when I’m around air conditioning. This time around my symptoms were a little different; I ran a fever and had chills. My head felt like it was simultaneously a hot air balloon that was being squeezed into a vise, which is the normal feeling. This time around dizziness settled in as well. If it weren’t for my head, you’d think I was fine. I still had pep and vigor to clean and cook but I was just a little delayed due to blowing my nose and needed to breathe.

Luckily I feel better now except that I can’t taste anything and I can’t smell. It’s actually gotten worse in the last few days instead of better. I had coffee with hazelnut syrup yesterday and all I could taste was what seemed like warm water. All my flavored teas seemed like warm sock water. Iced drinks were the same. My spicy food doesn’t seem spicy even though my lips are still burning so it’s good to know some things are working. Wasabi didn’t give me my usual brain kick but it did make my nose run. So maybe this isn’t too bad in practice.

From blowing my nose, I blew out an ear and can’t hear too well. Every time I blow my nose now, that same ear makes a beeping noise. My nostrils are sore and peeling and aside from the fact that I’ll definitely win Miss America from present appearance, I’m doing better. Thanks for asking.

The best part of not being able to smell is that I don’t have to really worry when my husband warns me to not go to the bathroom after he’s gone. Usually I hold off but since I am not phased in this regard, I don’t have die by making my bladder explode.