Whatever happened to….being polite?

Lately I’ve noticed an increase in rudeness all over the United States. We’ve all seen it with examples like Kanye West at the MTV Video Music Awards and such. When did this all happen?

I really wondered about this today after getting rammed in the calf by a shopping card at my local supermarket. Granted I know it’s crowded and New Year’s Eve and people are doing their holiday food shopping. But an ‘excuse me’ really would have cushioned the blow. Instead I have a nice contusion on my pulpy flesh.

Honestly I’m used to it, living in New York and all, especially when I undertake to gridiron tactics at this particular grocery store. But I’m not going to blame this behavior on the Big Apple. I think this is happening everywhere.

People hit you in the street as they walk by, step on your toes on the subway, the list continues. Yet no one says ‘Sorry’. And the worst part is that it seems like people think this is appropriate behavior. I read recently that the best way to stop this kind of behavior is to be nasty back. I’m not sure if I agree with that tactic. But it sure feels like you have to say something when people are such jerks.

Has anyone else noticed this? Or am I just imagining things?

I'm Dreaming of a White New Year?

Yes, it's snowing again. As much as I love the snow, today, I'm finding it a bit annoying.

In the last month I've seen quite a bit of snow. Almost a foot was dropped here in the city about two weeks ago. Then due to the blizzard in Dallas, my flights to and from Mexico City were either cancelled or delayed. And now, I had to trudge through it carrying extremely heavy groceries in preparation for tomorrow's New Year's Day meal.

Ok ok, it's not really that bad. I'm just in a bad mood today and need to vent somewhere.

Regardless of the powder, I hope everyone has a lovely and safe New Year's Eve.

Where the Streets Have No Numbers

Traveling is so much fun for me because I get to see how people around the world live. It also shows me what they think is important and of value. I enjoy seeing those little things that are often missed on a quick tour but that say so much about the country.

At this moment, I'm writing from Mexico City as I've been spending some time with the Mexican-in-laws. Earlier this week we went to Cuernavaca, a city south of Mexico City to spend some time getting some sun and eating some wonderful Mexican home cooking.

It has been a long day before we arrived. Almost 24 hours in transit from New York, through Dallas, delayed by snow storms in the Lone Star State, only to get to my Mexican-in-laws Cuernavaca vacation home. And where do they live? None other than the "Street with No Name #10." For some reason this really felt like an excellent punctuation mark to this long day. It also told me that it doesn't matter where or what street you live on as long as there is a number involved.

The Best of 2009

Things that happened/that I enjoyed/that I'll remember about this year (in no particular order):
1)Completed my albatross
2)"Unaccustomed Earth" and "The White Tiger"
3)A broken elbow in July
4)A sprained ankle in November in Morocco
5)Pixar's 'Up' and Dug (SQUIRREL!!)
6)The Wedding in Tenerife
7)Liquid Poop
8)Callate Antonio!
9)The Cousins on the Continent - foto, please!
10)"Glee"
11) Michael Emerson and Terry O'Quinn on "Lost"
12)Hi-fiving my co-worker and missing
13)Brian Condon
14)Lucy Orly Toronto Cristol
15)Magnificent Morocco - a.k.a. I love olives
16) My friend's big, fat Greek wedding.
17) Billy Elliot
18) Vermont with the girls
19) Therese Raquin by Emile Zola
20) A day at the zoo in France

I'm sure I'm missing a bunch of stuff but I limited myself to 20 and I'll just have to honor the rest in their own posts.

Strike a Pose

Lately, I’ve had a little time on my hands so I’ve been checking and viewing my friend’s facebook pages. Reading and viewing the pictures and commentaries has been fun since it’s provided another view into my friends’ personalities.

However something I’ve noticed in my viewing of the pictures on these pages has disturbed me a bit. I’ve noticed a lot of pictures of women in groups standing sideways towards the camera. And in this position a number of the women have one hand on their hips. Now, I know this pose. I’ve seen it before….where?? Ah….the super model pose.

I’m baffled by the use of this photographic technique for two reasons:
1) I know magazines say to use it because it makes you look thinner
2) How can it make you look thin if you aren’t a supermodel to begin?

Of course it makes models look thin. They are skeletal at birth. And I’m pretty darn sure photographers make them use this pose so it’s easier for the viewer to actually identify a person attached to the jutting angularity of an elbow. If they were just standing sideways, they would be invisible or a thin line marking the photo.

For normal people, this pose looks ridiculous because it does not make you appear thin whatsoever (especially if you have arm jelly handing in space like that). It makes you look like you are uncomfortable with your body and that you are trying to hide it. Sadly all this very unnatural pose does is point out that you have no self-confidence and that you can’t think for yourself…that you need a magazine’s ideas (or the fashion world’s ideas for that matter) to superficially mask that you don’t like how you look.

Pillow Talk

One think I’ve learned as I’ve grown older is to lighten my load when traveling. Bringing and packing the bare minimum because it makes things easier when you have to get to the airport and when you are in the airport too. There’s nothing more annoying than having heavy things slowing you down.

I also bring a bag that I use as my carry-on that has a change of clothing and some toiletries. After being stuck in some remote place without a toothbrush and a change of underwear, you begin to see the value of that.

Something very common that I’ve noticed over the years is people traveling with a pillow. This strikes me as odd on a number of levels. First of all because no matter how you hold a standard pillow, it’s always bulky and cumbersome. It’s an exasperating thing to carry.

Secondly it’s odd because if you are traveling alone, where do you put it when you go to the restroom? I barely want to step into some airport bathrooms with my feet covered in biologically protected footwear. Why would I want to bring an item that touches my face into an unsanitary place like that?

I know it’s tough to sleep on planes and the daily comforts that we take for granted can play a big part in making these trips easier. But I just don’t think in the long run dragging a pillow around is more of a hassle than it is worth.

It's Beginning to Look a Lot Like...

Chrisnukah!!

What am i talking about now? Well, living in the city all of my life, I've been surrounded by the holidays of both Christmas and Hanukah. They are almost one and the same to me since almost everyone I know celebrates one or the other. So why not blend them together and make one holiday so that we can all:

Decorate a tree
Light a pretty candlebra
Sing carols
Eat pieces of chocolate gelt
Dress up in a red velvet suit and wear a white beard
Spin some dreidels

Sadly, I don't know enough about Kwanzaa but I think it would be great to have one big holiday that lasts 8 days. During this holiday everyone could practice the traditions and ideas of all these spiritual beliefs. Who's with me?

I think we could all do with some more time with friends and family. It doesn't have to be about exchanging lots of big gifts. The biggest gift can just be surrounding yourself with those you love. And I don't mean spending time with people that are related to you that annoy you. I mean spending time playing games with your dearest and closest. Isn't that what a holiday is supposed to be?

Let It Snow

I absolutely love the first snowfall of the year. I don't really know why it is. There is something about the pristine clarity of the morning that makes me so happy to be alive. And then there are the doggies out and about enjoying the fluff. It just makes me feel like I'm a kid again.

What beautiful about this year's first snowfall is that it's close to Christmas so I want to sing. It makes me feel more in the holiday spirit. And this year, I've encountered an awful lot of grinches so it makes it lovelier to just stick it to them all.

As always Foxy was super excited to be bouncing around in the snow. She doesn't care how high the snow reaches, she jumps right in with reckless abandon. To see her doing that makes me so giddy. I get a high just from watching her happiness. I think if more people could feel that joyous about snow, we'd all be nicer people.

Yes, it slows things down. Yes, it's messy after a while. But couldn't we all use a little slowing down every so often? It's a pleasure to actually take my time to get places and enjoy the feel of the snow crunching under my boots.

It's these moments in life that we should embrace. Take a little time to enjoy nature and enjoy our lives. Snow helps us to remember the small details of life we often take for granted.

The Watch

The first time I saw it
Was just after Valentine’s Day
A lovely piece that wasn’t too ostentatious
Simple leather strap with some diamond-like items
Circling the face

It was a bright red color and it looked exquisite
On her delicate wrist
She never showed it off or made a big deal about it
But every day she wore it
And it must have reminded her of the person who purchased it
Could have been her own purchase
Or a gift
The way she took it off and looked at it though
Suggested it was a gift from someone she loved very much

Through the cold and the heat, it was always there.
She would rub it during meetings
Like it was as breakable as an egg.
Imagined that she only took it off to shower
It became like a second skin
Months went by and the piece never moved from
The inside pulse point
Until one day something different took its place
A plastic band of brown that matched her clothing
It stood out though because it wasn’t dainty like the other one
It didn’t blend into her wrist as the earlier piece had
It was a replacement
To tell the time
And chronicle her moments
But not to remind her of the love that was formerly there.

Guilty Pleasures #3

I watch way too much television, it’s true. Our DVR has so many shows on it, I’m not sure when I will ever see the percentage get down to the single digits again. But I can’t help watching some shows. They are schlocky and ridiculous but yet, I’m mesmerized by them and I’m not sure why.

One such show is Gossip Girl. I may not watch it religiously every week but I do marathons and I’m so hooked. It’s not as though I find any of the actors overly attractive and I can’t not watch because they are so yummy (it’s happened before…ahem ‘Smallville’) that my eyes are glued to the tv set. The plots are interesting but slightly formulaic and/or predictable (not like Lost which I confess to everyone is one of the best shows ever!!). Maybe it’s the clothes that the girls wear on the show. I wish I could fit into some of those outfits. Or maybe quite frankly it’s the fact that these people play teenagers and their skin is flawless!! When I was a teenager, please!! Bumps popped up left and right at any given moment….why don’t they have this problem??

Of course I know it’s because the actors are in their 20s so they don’t have teenage acne. But they don’t have adult acne either!! And none of these people have braces which I had in my early teens. And all of these girls know how to put makeup on well. Please, that took somewhere in my mid to late 20’s to get decent (let’s not talk about perfecting..I’m still working on it). Maybe I’m just fascinated by airbrushing…and that’s why I watch the show.

Honesty...Best Policy?

Many parents teach their children to be honest and it’s a great lesson. As you get older though, that lesson’s theory becomes quite different in practice. I am a firm believer in being honest but there are times when I’m not so sure if my instinct to do so is such a good idea.

For instance, because I’m a big believe in Murphy’s law, I don’t like to tell the complete truth if I think that it might bring about bad luck. For instance, a friend of mine was interviewing for a position different than the one she was already occupying and she asked my advice. She wondered if she should tell her current boss that she was interviewing. My advice to her was ‘No’. Now some people would say that’s dishonest but I would say it’s better to be cautious. Since you can never tell how a person is going to react when you tell them the truth, it’s sometimes better to just avoid telling them for a while. I know, I’m horrible. But in this instance, what if my friend’s boss got upset that she was interviewing? She could begin to make her current work life a million times more horrible than it already was. Or, what if she didn’t get the job that she was interviewing for and her boss now knew she was interviewing, then the boss might get upset that she was looking to leave and make her current work life a billion times worse than it already was. Plus, by going out there and saying she was interviewing seemed silly if there wasn’t a job offer yet. Don’t count your eggs before they hatch type of deal, you know??

I’m a big believer in treating others as I’d like to be treated. So if one of my employees were to tell me they were interviewing, I don’t think I’d get upset. I might want to know why or how I had failed them as a manager, but I don’t think I would become vindictive. But the problem is that you never know how others will act.

Let’s take an example from the past when I’ve been honest. Long ago I told someone my true feelings for them and they seemed happy with the news at first. But after some time, the person began to be someone other than who I thought they were. And that’s fine and I could say that I finally learned what the person was really like by being honest. But I certainly would have enjoyed not feeling like a big ball of confused poop for that time when they were deciding how to deal with my news.

Basically, being honest in every single action isn’t as easy as the advice to be that way is. Overall, I think it is best to be honest but the fact is that I can’t expect that everyone around me will be as open to honesty and be as mature with the information as I think I am. And that my friend is part of the honesty is the best policy talk that I think every parent and person should pass along.

What’s in a Name?

My man, Bill Shakespeare said that a rose by any other name would smell as sweet. He may have had a point there. What Willy Shakes didn’t quite consider is what happens when you mess up a person’s name or give them a completely different name.

My husband has a horrible memory for people’s names. He often decides to christen them a name completely different from the one their parents gave them at birth.

Here’s are a couple of examples:
1) The brother of my good friend has been renamed David by my husband. His Christian name is Joseph. I have no idea why my husband thinks that David fits him better but Gosh forbid I can get him to call him by his real name any more.
2) At a wedding we met a couple whose names were Pablo and Elizabeth. Pretty easy to me. But when we saw them at the airport the next morning my husband claimed ‘Hey there is Mike!’
My response was to look around to see if there was a Mike around that I knew. No Mike!
“Where is Mike?”
“Right there” he pointed to Pablo
“Honey, that’s Pablo. Not Mike.”
“He doesn’t look like a Pablo and his wife doesn’t look like an Elizabeth. Maybe a Carolina but definitely not an Elizabeth.”
I basically just rolled my eyes and continued to wait in the check out line

Now, don’t get me wrong. This kind of thing has happened to me as well.
In the early stages of one of my book clubs, we were meeting at particularly noisy places. We went around introducing ourselves and one gentleman said his name was Devon. And so that his name stuck with me and I would remember it, I repeated it. Later on, I learned his name was Daniel. To this day though, I refer to him as Devon even though I know his name is Daniel.

What I’m suggesting is that no matter what we want, we should try to really learn people’s names, even if they don’t ‘fit’ them.

At a Loss for Words

As I’ve grown older, I am less likely to talk. Yes, I am becoming the curmudgeon I always thought I’d never become. (Well, I guess I’m not really a curmudgeon because they usually yell and rant and rave, right? They are usually men too but you know what, I think curmudgeons can be any gender!) I just feel like people don’t listen so what’s the point in talking.

It’s funny because this has been a constant bone of contention with certain people. They want me to talk more but these are the same people who interrupt me when I talk. Or they squash exactly what I have to say. And whenever I do talk to them, they don’t listen to a single thing I say….So I say why talk when no one is listening?

It gets more and more complicated when you feel like the people who have been listening to you all along have now turned a deaf ear to you. When did it become so difficult? When did people stop listening? I’m sure the need to be heard will not go away. So, my friends, how do we get people to listen?

I’ve been accused of not being a good listener by some but I don’t think that’s true. Perhaps the problem lies in me. In order for more people to listen more attentively, I have to be able to listen more attentively myself.

Useless Information

Pigs, dogs, and some other animals can taste water, but people cannot. Humans don’t actually taste water; they only taste the chemicals and impurities in the water.

As you can tell from scanning my blog, I have this silly gadget called ‘Useless Information’ in the top portion of the page. I pulled this bit from it a while ago. I thought it was quite interesting. I’ve often complained about this very thing to people. How can I drink the recommended amount of water every day when it doesn’t taste like anything but plastic, chemicals and such?

My dogs, they drink up water the way I eat chocolate – with fervor and reckless abandon. I wouldn’t mind doing that. Why can’t they make water taste like chocolate?

Anyway, that’s my input for the day.

Adjustment Bureau

On a recent walk around the block at work, my co-worker and I noticed some signs of a movie being filmed. The name on the signs was “Adjustment Bureau”. This didn’t sound like a decent movie name to me. My co-worker asked who I thought might star in a movie like that. I said ‘No one because it sounds like a fake movie name to me’. My thinking was that if they put the real name up, people would be flocking to these locations to be ‘extras’ on these movies.

My co-worker decided to look up ‘Adjustment Bureau’ on Google. And lo and behold, it’s a real movie. I still don’t think I’d want to see this movie. The title does nothing for me but who knows. Based on the actor, I might go see it.

Goes to show you, you can’t just a movie by its title.

Don't Stop Believin'

A few days ago my husband sent me a video of someone caught dancing at a wedding or some other type of festivity. The dancer was clearly drunk but boy! could this guy move! I mean that sarcastically. I have to find a way to link to the video on my blog so you can see it.

What I loved about this video, aside from its making me cry, is watching the pure joy this person was having while dancing. The creativity alone was something that amazed me beyond the extension of my dumbfounded jaw hanging off my face. Basically, it reminded me that every where you go now, someone has a camera. And if you can't believe how stupid people can be, this one will evoke the title of this blog.

I'm pretty sure my husband has a link to it on his page. It's called Baile Duranguense....enjoy!

Laughter in New York

I’m catching up on a lot of blog writing I should have done a while ago. Every so often my husband and I go to comedy events. After all laughter is the best medicine. Last month we went to see the British comedian, Ricky Gervais, give a show at Carnegie Hall.
It was the second part of a show that he did last year which was on HBO.

Now he’s got something that I find very funny. I’m not entirely sure what it is but he just has a way of putting things that make me crack up. And I know that the job of comedian but it’s sometimes the subject(s) of their routine that make them more memorable than the comedian themselves.

Ricky Gervais likes talking about animals and wildlife and useless fact about animals. I find this very funny and endearing. The best part of his routine was an explanation of the Noah’s Ark story that just made tears stream down my eyes from the silliness of it. It’s what I appreciate about being an adult. You often see and hear things as a child that you take at face value. But as an adult you notice things from a different perspective and you question those ideas/thoughts you once had. I guess that’s what I appreciate about his comedy.

And what made this event even better is that at the end of his act, there was a guest appearance by none other than Elmo, the Sesame Street character. Not only was this to celebrate 40 years of Sesame Street but it was also a way of showing Ricky Gervais in an entirely different and endearing light. He and Elmo belted out “New York, New York” together to much applause. Overall it was a lovely end to a very lively evening.

Reflections on the Past

I’m not sure how I let so much time go by without talking about a recent event. Two months ago I went to see U2 (my super favorite band) in concert. It was a truly magical night even if I can’t say it was their best performance. It’s even hard for me to say that because really every time I see them I am mesmerized. And I was mesmerized but in a very different way than I had been in the past.

A few of the times I’ve seen them they have played arenas and for me that is where they shine. There is a level of intimacy with the audience that is reached in those smaller venues that makes you feel like you are transcending human flesh. This time around, seeing them in a stadium, I was reminded of their creativity. The stage looked like an immense spider with legs located in various points of the globe. The circular stage (what I would call the body of the spider) had a bridge that spun around the whole circle allowing the band members to reach and be seen by all audience members. This design made the group viewed by all – 360 degrees of U2. (That’s pretty much how they got the name of the tour.) I couldn’t ask for anything more.

Part of why I didn’t comment about this earlier is that I was testing a hypothesis. As many of you know, I adore this group – each and every one of them. Of course I think Bono is the best thing since chocolate. But I wanted to see if perhaps I’m not tooting their horn a bit too much. Before their recent album came out I voraciously read every article and review. The band had mentioned how they went to Fez and the music and ambience there had considerable inspired this album.

Having returned from Morocco (a place I’d always wanted to go to anyway), I can and can’t say that I felt this influence. There wasn’t a lot of Muslim musical influence but there was a sense of peace in the album that I definitely sensed in Fez. This is what I was testing out. Were they pulling my leg with that malarkey about Fez? No. Many other people said they felt the same thing and they didn’t mention any appreciation or love of U2.

This made me more convinced of how wonderful this group is. Even though some people say they have sold out, which I can totally see, they have an enormous place in my heart. It’s rare that you find a group whose lyrics and spirit fill you with a sense of pride and emotion. They certainly have not been a flash in the pan. Although some people say they are past their prime, I still think they have a lot left to say and contribute to the world.

Guilty Pleasures Redux

I love the show ‘Glee’. Even though I find a couple of the characters incredibly annoying and grating on my nerves, the rest of the show and characters truly makes up for it. I love the writing as some of the lines make me howl (leading my husband to always ask what I’m watching).

I’m happy that it’s doing well and that people are watching it. I’d hate to get inspired and enthusiastic about a show again only to see it canceled. (See past blog ‘Idiot Box’) The musical numbers along with it are creative and the story lines are clever. If you haven’t caught the bug, I suggest you give it a try. You’ll probably be pleasantly surprised.

Now I’m going to make my way to another site to see what they said about last night’s episode.