Passing Notes

I believe that people don't really evolve very much after high school. I am fairly certain that I have even discussed this in earlier blog entries but I digress. So many of the behaviors and actions that are prevalent in high school might be muted as adults but the tendencies are always there.

One aspect of those bygone days is note passing. Let's really think about this for a moment. Isn't texting just another form of note passing? You want to talk to someone or you want to talk about someone to someone else then you send a text. Instead of secretly passing a paper through the aisles, you pick up your device, fingers move quickly to express thought and voila...note sent.

But again, I digress. The reason that prompted this entry is due to some incidents in the past few months that I have encountered in the work place. Sadly these incidents all revolve around women so I can't begin one of my sociological experiments but hear me out nonetheless.

In many meetings a colleague or a senior manager will take a pen and write a note to me either directly in my notebook or on a piece of paper and pass it to me. I find this behavior to be very peculiar because as a sometimes teacher, I would immediately notice this comportment in a classroom. I find it hard to believe others would not but it is the teacher in me to look for these transgressions.

What I also find odd in this note passing/writing is that it is often accompanied with an explanation in a whisper of what the note means. I ask myself when this happens "Then why write or send the note anyway when you are going to explain it to me? Just say what you need to say!" I usually nod and try to get back to paying attention to the meeting or to continuing to present the meeting materials.

And here's where the difference is between high school, I don't remember this accompanying explanation. There was just a note and you understood or you didn't. If you didn't, then you'd meet up with the person in the hallway between classes or call that person after class. Perhaps I am forgetting what it really was like because I have such a distance from those times. Occasionally there was the ever covert hand cupping against the other person's ear maneuver to explain. Mostly this was used in urgent situations such as in "that person likes you" or "can I copy your homework"? Rarely was it used to annoy you while you are trying to do something serious - like pay attention in a meeting.

Perhaps I'm waxing nostalgic and should take a time machine back to those days and see myself during those moments of surreptitious communication. I doubt that even if I did, I would notice behavior that's evolved much over time.

Characters

As I have mentioned in other entries, I really enjoyed my time in high school. Many people dreaded their high school experience but I have many fond memories that always bring a smile to my face even now. Much of my nostalgia is based on the teachers I had. They were quite a group of characters and their sense of humor appealed to me back in high school as it does now many years later.

Our biology and physics teacher was one of those people you didn’t quite know what to make of. He would occasionally spew off phrases to us in German thinking we understood him. When we looked at him quizzically, he would sometimes realize he wasn’t speaking English. After 4 years though, we all became pretty proficient at knowing what he was saying to us when he was speaking in German. He also had a bag full of ridiculous proverbs he would say to us. Sometimes they made sense and other times, they would lead to more puzzled stares.

Our freshman English teacher, who also taught us French for a year, once caught one of our classmates chewing gum in class and made her wear the piece of gum on her nose the rest of the day. As cruel as it sounds, I enjoyed the idea of it because the girl chewed like a cow.

The other teacher who taught us French was a total crazy loon. There were times when we would point out her mistakes to her. She was much older and lost her train of thought on many occasions. She also had a habit of burping in the middle of her lessons. After two years of that we couldn’t wait to get rid of her.

One of our religion teachers had a feminist streak in her and so she taught us how to interpret scriptures and other biblical texts with a pointed gaze of people who had been excluded from the stories – the women. She was a fascinating teacher because she was tough and intelligent and demanded a lot from us. At the same time, I think we all learned an immense amount from her – not only on a religious level but on a critical thinking path when looking at literature.

All our literature teachers were great because they appreciated and enjoyed the texts we were reading. They gave us all a heightened sense of appreciation for literature in its many forms and what could be learned from books and poems and plays. We were encouraged to question everything, not just literature and it prepared me for college in ways I never imagined while I was in high school.

Yes, so some of the teachers were characters but they definitely kept the classroom interesting. Overall they taught and prepared us for the real world.

The Reunion

Saturday marked the anniversary reunion of my high school class. There were two events for the occasion but I was only able to attend one of them. The annual luncheon is something that our school organizes to get people to come out and spend a couple of hours with old friends and teachers.

A total of 11 people from my class showed up from about a group of 50, so it was a pretty good turn out. We all caught up on each other’s lives and reminisced about funny times and crazy teachers. It was really a lot of fun.

We also got to prance up on a stage as they celebrated the graduating classes of years ‘2 and ‘7 (eg 1992, 1997, 2002, 2007) and our names were called out. We got a little gift which was nice. We also got a nice meal and got to partake in a couple of auctions that were taking place.

Before the meal someone gave grace. As I looked over at the rest of my classmates, most of us were deep in prayer, except for one person. This made me laugh because it reminded me of high school – those irreverent few who never followed rules and danced to the beat of their own drum. Some things hadn’t changed at all.

A number of our teachers were there and it was great to talk to them and catch up with them. Having seen some of them a month ago, it was nice for me to see them basking in the other students who they hadn’t seen in so long.

I dragged my husband to the event and I had warned him that it might be a difficult situation – a bunch of girls returning to teenage-dom. But he said we weren’t that bad. I told him it was the particular group that showed up. I suspected it would be different at the other event to which we would not be privy.

Overall, it was nice to see many of my friends and connect with old classmates. Being reminded of the path and mission of our school was nice as well. Seeing all the present day students of my high school and what they were accomplishing made me proud as well. We have a legacy to uphold and we are all doing our best to contribute every day.

Going Home

A few days ago I spoke about how I went back to my high school to speak at Career Day. It was a great experience to be able to discuss what I do with young girls and to give them an idea of the world out there. The best part of the event wasn’t even talking to the girls; it was the nostalgia and comfort I felt with going back to my high school.

I, unlike a lot of people I know, thoroughly enjoyed high school (c.f. blog entry ‘A Safe Place’). I was allowed to be creative and I was challenged at every stage by my teachers. But at the same time I felt supported which was a great feeling during those awkward teenage years.

So going back to high school, albeit in a completely different school building, still brought back fond memories. I saw a number of the teachers who taught me and we reminisced. Some of the teachers haven’t aged at all which helped me feel like I was back in my uniform again. While talking to them, I felt like I never left because the discussions were the same – open, welcoming and yet challenging. They asked a lot of good questions of me – the same as those I encountered back in the high school but with the ‘real world’ twist.

As I rushed back to work I found myself dreading leaving the building. It was so nice to be there – joking with the teachers – in a way I never would have back in the day. The high school student had now grown up and was accepted by her former teachers in her adult version.

A Safe Place

I was recently asked if there was a time or a place where I felt happy and I had to think about it for a bit. The first ideas that blossomed in my mind were from high school. I went to a small all-girls Catholic school and I had always had fond memories of it. When I started to consider what about it made it safe for me, I realized the truly profound impact going there had in my life.

Part of what made it safe is that it was small and by the time you finished your 4 years, you knew everyone pretty well. (That intimate knowledge of people could be why people fell out of friendships in the end but I don’t hold that as a bad thing. We evolve and our needs change.) Many of the teachers always encouraged us to question things and to explore and be curious. Being naturally curious, this freedom was very helpful for me. When I was creative, I was supported. Teachers and other students encouraged me to use my talents.

I spent a lot of time in my high school; not only the mandatory school time but also tons of after school time. I was on the yearbook staff, the literary committee, the drama club and choir (to name the ones I remember most). I really don’t know how I got all my school work done or how I was in all the advanced classes either. Somehow I managed.

One year for the annual talent show, I wrote a one act play and performed it with a bunch of my friends. It was a success in my definition; people lauded it and I felt great for having written something so many people enjoyed.

Often when I think about a time that I want to replicate in my adult life, I think of those four years. I had time, despite what it seems like in my description here, to be creative and to use my talents. After that time, it all went down hill. I used my writing less and less creatively. I didn’t feel supported for my decisions or opinions. It was a good time for me and I am happy to have had it; particularly because I know how many other teenagers had such a horrible time in their high schools.