Sorry Doesn’t Mean Squat

I’m really tired of people who say sorry and think that whatever they did should just get brushed off the face of the earth because they said sorry. Just saying sorry doesn’t count. If you keep doing something over and over and it annoys someone, then maybe you should try not to do that thing over and over. Because saying sorry doesn’t negate that you did and that you will continue to do it.

A couple of examples if you will amuse me:

1) A person I know consistently communicates their objectives poorly, which results in a lot of stupid, inefficient and unnecessary work. When they are caught on it, they say ‘Sorry’. But this doesn’t help me because a) It’s not sincere b) They continually do this without making any changes to their behavior.
2) Another person commits the same error over and over. And it’s very frustrating and hurtful to me. So when I tell them specifically why it bothers me, they say “Sorry”. It’s very warm and fuzzy but if they do it again and again after I’ve told them that it’s hurtful, then sorry doesn’t mean anything to me.

The problem with ‘sorry’ and a lot of words that we use on a daily basis is that they’ve lost their meaning. Sorry should be used in a heartfelt and sincere manner. And that means that whatever an incident has transpired where a sorry is needed, a little reflection needs to happen as well. Why did this event merit a sorry? Could something be different in the future so that sorry doesn’t have to be said?

I know that’s asking for a lot from people. because this reflection that I’m asking for would actually necessitate some thinking on the offender’s behalf. From that thinking, behavior would need to be modified and we all know how hard it is to make a change to ourselves. But the most important thing is that it would actually mean the offender would need to see that they are wrong. They have done something bad and they need to change what they are doing. So, with all this said, I’m not holding my breath that these people will change or stop saying ‘Sorry’. I just don’t want to hear it anymore!